Mano a Procyon Lotor

Just after 11pm on Saturday night, Dan was watching a movie and I was sitting next to him reading a book. We heard a muffled crash. I told Dan that the crash was a big, scary raccoon (I had seen him a couple of hours earlier) raiding our garbage. Dan practically flew to the side door to catch the beast in the act.

The raccoon was relatively unafraid of us. Through an open window, we eyed one another. Dan wanted to go outside and spray the raccoon with water. I refused to allow this. He wanted to get the raccoon off our steps just long enough to haul our garbage bin inside our house. Thank goodness he has me to stop him! We agreed to frighten the raccoon away and then put the garbage in the shed.

We started the car by remote, which caused the raccoon to waddle rapidly to the backyard. When he realised that there was no threat, he waddled back. Perched on our steps, he waited for our next move. My barking didn't phase the raccoon, but it did annoy Dan. Banging the door did nothing. Finally, Dan took the broom handle and banged fiercely on the porch, and the raccoon took off across the street. I raced to the front of the house, and I watched that raccoon. The raccoon watched Dan put the garbage in the shed.

This may not sound like a big deal, but I am absolutely terrified of the vast majority of creatures that are on this planet. Big on my list are raccoons, skunks, mice, squirrels, and cats. I like to pretend that none of these animals exist. Now that I have absolute proof that we have a raccoon (I had convinced myself that crows were getting our garbage), I have to get rid of it. I googled "how to deter raccoons". A website advised me to get a big cord and tie up my garbage can. Not bloody likely. I will have to find another solution. Otherwise, I will let Dan go out and tango with that raccoon!