Thursday, April 29

HIDE!

Sarah has a new game that she likes to play. She shouts, "Hide!" and we all must take cover. It sounds fun and cute and wonderful, but after 472 times in a row, hiding becomes tedious.

Today, Sarah was sitting on my lap having a cuddle. Without warning or reason, she shouted, "HIDE!". I grabbed her blankie and covered us both up. While under the blankie, I said, "Why are we hiding?". She looked very concerned, pointed out the window and whispered, "Dragon".

I felt so badly. My littlest one thought there were dragons preying on us. Unless we covered our heads, they would surely spot us, and gobble us up.  I held my baby and said, "Sarah, there are no dragons.". She said, "Oh". She seemed relieved. I felt wonderful knowing that I chased the idea of dragons away. That one sentence would make her feel protected and safe. Best of all, it would surely bring an end to this ridiculous game.

Then she screamed, "HIDE!". I knew that we were no longer hiding from dragons. I had cleared that up already. Now we seemed to be hiding for the sake of hiding. Or maybe we doing that all along.

Wednesday, April 28

Doctor's Orders

The girls and I went to a paediatrician this morning. We were referred to him because Bethie suddenly becomes extremely tired. She stops everything she's doing and lies down right where she is. Needless to say, I am concerned. Before I go on, let me reassure you that the results of her blood work show that she's fine.

Anyway, the paediatrician wants me to drastically modify her diet to see what effect some nutrition will have on Bethie. This was when both Bethie and I got nervous. The paediatrician announced some foods that Bethie could not have. These include honey, soft drinks, and rice. No problem, thought my baby girl. She's never had honey (I don't like it), and we don't typically hand out cola to our wee girls. Rice is, apparently, one of the many items that she boycotts because it's "disgusting".  He then added sugar, candies, fruit juices, cheese, bananas, and white flour to the list of banned items. We both looked at him in shock! What's left to eat?! Surely, the child will wither away!

I then asked the paediatrician about acceptable foods. He proclaimed that the child shall eat cooked whole grains, nuts, salad, green vegetables, fruit with the skin on, bran, lots of water, and (as a consolation) popcorn. Bethie doesn't like popcorn, which she pointed out to the doctor. She told the doctor that she will gladly eat nuts, broccoli, green beans, grapes, pears, and peaches. That's it!

Still floored, we meekly walked out of the paediatrician's office. Then we got into my little red car and went to Tim Horton's for doughnuts. The girls like the kind with all the sprinkles on top. I permitted this. I felt it was like an alcoholic having one last drink before he went to rehab. All three girls had a shot of sugar to soften this devastating blow!

Thursday, April 22

In My Dreams

I have a plan. Well, it's more of a fantasy, really. But it helps me get through the frustration of raising three children who don't seem to understand any key concepts of socialization. When everything seems to be out of control, and I am reduced to a raving lunatic that everyone ignores, my mind races forward to a warm night in August 2033. I imagine our twins, then ages 28, and Sarah, age 25, throwing a 35th wedding anniversary dinner for me and Dan. They will have planned out the evening, and the menu. They will have put a lot of effort into making the evening special. The girls, now young women, will be waiting at the front door as Dan and I drive up. They won't know what hit them!

Dan and I will leap out of our car and promptly run through their garden. We will spot the prettiest flower, pick it, and then throw it on the ground. Then we'll do it again. And again. And again. Until there are no flowers left. Then, we will ring the doorbell 500 times, knowing full well that the house is empty and ringing the doorbell for no reason is irritating.

Next, we will go into the house and fling our shoes and our jackets across the room. There they will remain until someone else picks them up. Dan and I will separate. He will empty the kitchen cupboards, and I will head for the more breakable "treasures". Within minutes, the house will be destroyed and the level of anxiety will be through the roof. The children will usher us to the table thinking that a lovingly prepared dinner will make everyone happy. They will be wrong. Regardless of whatever magnificent feast is laid before me, I shall screech, "I didn't want THAT! It's DISGUSTING!". With that, I will fired my plate across the table. I will leap up from my seat, and race around the island screaming. For effect, Dan will follow.

The children will offer to make us something else. We will demand peanut butter sandwiches. Once the sandwiches are produced, we will walk calmly around the table eating the sandwiches and picking food off of other people's plates. Periodically, we will throw food on the floor, or hide bits of our sandwiches throughout the house. We will knock our juice onto the floor, not tell anyone, and then walk through it. We will wipe our hands under the kitchen table. At some point, we will use the washroom and forget to flush the toilet.

We won't leave until the children are exhausted, and livid. They will walk us to our car, just to ensure that we are actually leaving. Dan and I will sit in the car and order the children to "DANCE!" while we pull away. Seriously! They must dance! When we get home, we will call to thank the girls for a lovely evening, and tell them we will be back over the next night for an encore performance!

This fantasy, my friends, is all that keeps me going!

Wednesday, April 21

Angels of Death

As I worked in the garden, the twins buzzed around eager to "help". Really, I just wanted them out of the way. I told them to fill up their buckets with water, and to water all of my gardens. After about 10 minutes, I realized just how destructive the two of them could be with water! I asked them to come next to me and catch grubs.

Yup, grubs. We have tons of grubs. I have tried to get rid of them. Nothing works. Now, I am left to plucking them individually from the ground and killing them. Very gross. But the twins wanted to help.

Katie and Bethie got a purple Dora bucket and filled it half way up with water. I was told to drop the grubs into the bucket. The twins would then stir the water with sticks. Bethie would drop little pieces of grass in the bucket so the grubs would have something to eat, and Katie would drop rocks in hopes of sinking any grubs that were trying desperately to get out. Katie referred to her wee bucket as "The Killing Bucket".

I began to get tense. I really didn't like my sweet four year old twin girls taking such delight in killing. I told them that it was inappropriate to laugh at the poor grubs. That's when Bethie asked, "Is God happy that we are killing the grubs?".

What was I supposed to say? "Yup, God is thrilled that we are killing the bugs. In fact, that's why He made grubs, so we can torture and then kill them!"  Or, do I say, "No, God doesn't like us to kill anything. But I don't care what God thinks, go ahead and KILL THOSE GRUBS!"? Neither seemed entirely appropriate.

I ended up saying, "It's not good to kill anything. God is not thrilled, but He's not super angry. The bigger the animal, the angrier God gets. So, He's annoyed that we are slaughtering grubs, but he would be wicked angry if we killed a ... dog."

Bethie was horrified! She asked, "Who would kill a dog?! What else gets killed?".  Instead of itemizing all the things that one could possibly kill, I said "Watch out! The grubs are trying to get you!". And that put an end to our lesson in theology.

Sunday, April 18

Wish Upon A Star

The girls and I came home after the sun had set. The twins asked if they could have a moment outside so they could gaze at the stars. I didn't have a problem with that. They are good kids, they had behaved really well while we were out, and we had a super day. So, we gazed at the stars together.

Katie said, "I made a wish on a star!". I replied, "What did you wish for?". She looked at me, smiled sweetly, and said "I wished that you would be nicer than you were before.".

Thanks.

Monday, April 12

Random Snaps

Here are a couple of snaps from the long days I spend with the children!

Katie, Roxanne, and Bethie coming home from the park.

Katie (left) and Bethie putting peanut butter on pinecones. We then suspended the pinecones from some trees. This drove the squirrels absolutley crazy (much to our amusement)!

Bethie and Katie placing peanuts for the squirrels to eat. They had great fun watching the rodents come and eat the peanuts. Dan and I pleased both the children and the squirrels by standing at our back door and tossing even more peanuts when the squirrels had run out! The whole time we were doing this, I told the children that this would never happen again!


Bethie, Sarah, and Katie blowing bubbles (their father's idea!)

Sarah

Bethie



Bethie, Katie, and Sarah


The End.

Tuesday, April 6

The Baby Speaks

Sarah's speaking has improved drastically. Unfortunately, she has only really learned commands. She physically pushes us to where we keep the marshmellows and yells "Reach!". She stands in front of her swing and yells "Zoom!". She knows all the words for all the things she likes. She still calls both me and Dan "Mummy", and she refers to the twins as "Kate" and "Twin".

Sarah's favourite word is "No!". Her response to most questions is "No!", even if she means "Yes". This cracks me up. I have a series of questions that I enjoy asking:

"Do you want to go to sleep?"
"No!"
"Do you want a cookie?"
"No!"
"Do you love your Mummy?"
"No!"

The other day, Dan asked Sarah a very important question of his own. He said, "Sarah, did you take the almost full box of Corn Pops up to the twins' room, and dump it out behind the rocking chair?". Sarah's response was, "No!". She lied.

Thursday, April 1

A Walk In The Park

On Sunday, Mum and I took the twins for a bike ride at the Experimental Farm. The twins are "delicate" in nature, and did not enjoy the less than perfectly paved roads. They were also quite angry with me because the wind was blowing.  Regardless, I got a couple of snaps.

The twins "racing". Katie is in lead.

Bethie on her Princess bike.

Having given up (rather quickly) on the bike ride, we decided to walk around Dow's Lake.

Bethie

Bethie (left) and Katie in search of the perfect spot to toss their pine cones in the water.

They found it!

Bethie (left) and Katie


Bethie (left) and Katie

Katie - demanding that I take her photo as she dances

Bethie and her pine cones

Katie and her pine cones

Bethie, Granny, and Katie