Monday, March 30

The Gospel According To Elizabeth

We went to church yesterday. Mum took the kids to Sunday school and they learned about Easter. At dinner, Bethie gave us a summation of all she learned. Here's Bethie's version of the Easter story:

The man broke the bread and became Jesus. He had many followers who were jealous of him. That's why they wanted to hurt and kill him. When they succeeded in this task, they wrapped him up and locked him in a polar bear cave. Jesus is very scared of polar bears! The women came twice looking for his body but the bad guys had taken it to Heaven. In Heaven, God lets Jesus eat chocolate and watch Dora DVDs well past his bedtime.

Bethie then wanted to know if she was dying. She also wanted to know if Sam's (the little boy at daycare) followers were going to hurt him. At one point, Katie yelled at me "Why don't you love God?!". I said "I do love God.". She asked "Then why do you say "Jesus!"?".

Whatever happened to discussing butterflies and hopscotch at dinner? Needless to say, we will not be going back to church until after Easter.


Lisa D said...

In an attempt to get through to Trystan that leaving small toys where Gray can find them is not acceptable in our house I said one day that if Gray were to put that in his mouth he could die! I figured this would scare him enough to pack up the micro mini cars...instead my 4 year old turns to me and says "if Gray dies he will go to heaven and that is a good place to be, so it's okay"...damn catholic school...what do I say to that one? I understand your situation here...believe me I do...

Gwen said...

LOL! I tell the twins that if Sarah eats small items she will have to go to the hospital and sleep there forever. She won't be able to stay with us. That has been very effective. Why is everyone so keen to discuss death with preschoolers?