We went to church yesterday. Mum took the kids to Sunday school and they learned about Easter. At dinner, Bethie gave us a summation of all she learned. Here's Bethie's version of the Easter story:
The man broke the bread and became Jesus. He had many followers who were jealous of him. That's why they wanted to hurt and kill him. When they succeeded in this task, they wrapped him up and locked him in a polar bear cave. Jesus is very scared of polar bears! The women came twice looking for his body but the bad guys had taken it to Heaven. In Heaven, God lets Jesus eat chocolate and watch Dora DVDs well past his bedtime.
Bethie then wanted to know if she was dying. She also wanted to know if Sam's (the little boy at daycare) followers were going to hurt him. At one point, Katie yelled at me "Why don't you love God?!". I said "I do love God.". She asked "Then why do you say "Jesus!"?".
Whatever happened to discussing butterflies and hopscotch at dinner? Needless to say, we will not be going back to church until after Easter.